NAME: Stratton, Cort PRIOR OFFENSES: The Sims: Bustin' Out, EA Sports Fight Night 2004, The Urbz: Sims in the City CHARGED W/: Matrix/vector multiplication in significant excess of posted speed limits; declaring that "Danger" is his middle name (NOTE: charges dropped after subject produced legal documentation supporting his claim); sprinkling cinnamon in the macaroni and cheese. ALIASES: Danger, Danjer, Schadenfreude --Received extensive programming, endurance and black-ops combat training at Carnegie Mellon University (1997-2003). Subject considers himself a master of Entertainment Technology, and is rumored to know at least twelve ways to kill a man silently with a quaternion. --Previously incarcerated at the Electronic Arts Maximum Security [MAXIS] Penitentiary (2003-2005). (Archives dept: NASDAQ records indicate that the price of ERTS stock dropped over 15 points in the weeks following subject's transfer to NDI.)

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